Yooooo. I hope this message finds you in peace. I hope yall are prospering out here.
I do want to ask you a question though. How has your productivity been lately? Are you spending the time you actualy want to spend with your art? Or are you procrastinating with your gift?
I used to think I was procrastinating. Like I wasn’t disciplined enough… not consistent enough… not “locked in” enough.
But I didn’t realize how much of my creativity was being built in survival mode - and survival will let you create, but it won’t always let you create well, or consistently, or peacefully.
That didn’t fully hit me until I received a large grant for my art.
For the first time in my life, I had actual funding behind my vision that wasn’t coming out of rent money, bills, family responsibilities, and just… life.
And what’s wild is I’ve always been the type of artist who recorded, produced, and engineered myself - cutting my creation cost down to basically $0. So I had the brush, the canvas, the paint, the drive, the talent…
…but no resources to sustain it.
My art was valuable, but this “it’s priceless” mentality was slowly killing my passion - and honestly, it wasn’t fair to my family either. They deserved more than survival. They deserved stability.
It’s a different kind of pain inviting people to a big show with your name huge on the flyer… then afterwards needing a ride home and a generous $20 just to make it through the night.
So, let’s get one thing straight.
You’re not procrastinating.
You’re not lazy.
You’re not “undisciplined.”
You’re not “falling off.”
You’re just an artist with bills.
And bills don’t care about your creative process.
Procrastination Is Sometimes Just Poverty With Better Branding
People loooove to throw around words like consistency and grind and discipline like we all wake up with the same amount of freedom.
But the truth is:
When your rent is due,
when your kid needs something,
when your car doing that lil’ shake thing at the red light,
when you got 3 overdraft fees arguing with each other in your bank account…
Your brain does not prioritize “finish the album.”
Your brain prioritizes:
bro, survive.
So if you’ve been feeling stuck, frozen, distracted, unmotivated, scattered…
That might not be procrastination.
That might be your nervous system saying:
“We can’t create right now… we need money right now.”
And honestly fam?
That’s not weakness. That’s biology.
The Broke Artist Loop (That Nobody Talks About)
Here’s the cycle:
You have a vision
You need time to build it
Time requires money
Money requires time
So you do quick jobs to get quick money
Quick jobs drain your energy
Now you’re too tired to build the real thing
Now you feel behind
Now you shame yourself
Now you scroll, numb out, and call it procrastination
And the worst part?
You start believing the lie that you’re the problem.
But you’re not the problem.
You’re a creator trying to build a cathedral while people keep handing you $25 and a headache.
“I’m Not Doing It Because I Can’t Do It Right… Yet”
Sometimes we don’t delay because we’re lazy…
We delay because we care.
You don’t want to just “drop something.”
You want it to be right.
You want the mix clean.
You want the visuals to match.
You want the rollout to be intentional.
You want the words to land.
You want the offering to feel like you.
And when you don’t have the resources to do it how you know it should be done, you pause.
Not because you’re avoiding it.
But because you respect it.
That’s not procrastination.
That’s standards.
The Real Reason You Can’t Lock In
Let’s keep it a buck.
Some of y’all don’t need a productivity hack.
You need:
$600 for groceries
$120 for your phone bill
$1,600 for rent
$75 for gas
$40 for peace of mind
and $0 worth of people telling you to “just stay consistent”
Because it’s hard to create from overflow when you’re creating from lack.
And yes — you can be grateful and still be stressed.
You can have faith and still need funds.
You can love your gift and still be tired of struggling.
“But I Still Want to Create…” Good. Here’s the Shift.
If you’re in a season where you need right now money, you don’t need to force yourself into guilt.
You need to design your creativity around reality.
Here’s what I mean:
1. Stop calling it procrastination
Call it what it is:
Financial pressure.
Naming it right is healing by itself.
2. Separate “dream work” from “income work”
You need both.
But if you mix them together, you’ll start resenting the dream.
Income work is what keeps the lights on.
Dream work is what keeps the lights in you on.
3. Create smaller, cleaner, paid wins
Not “sell out.”
Just stabilize.
Because stability isn’t the enemy of creativity.
Stability is the floor creativity stands on.
4. Stop expecting your art to save you immediately
Your art is sacred.
But if you keep putting your whole survival on it, you’ll start squeezing it like a lemon.
Art can grow.
Art can mature.
Art can build momentum.
But art does not like being treated like an emergency contact.
The Truth: You’re Not Behind. You’re Under-Resourced.
And I need you to hear me clearly:
You are not a procrastinator.
You are not failing.
You are not broken.
You are simply a gifted person trying to build something real in a world that doesn’t fund art until it’s famous.
But that doesn’t mean your creativity is dead.
It means your creativity is waiting on support.
And support can look like:
a better schedule
a simpler plan
a side income stream
a creative fundraiser
an arts/small-busienss grant
a paid offer
a small product
a weekly creative ritual
a community that understands you
a system that keeps you grounded
Not hype.
Not pressure.
Not performative hustle.
Just alignment.
One Last Thing…
If you’ve been beating yourself up…
Please stop yo.
You’re not lazy.
You’re just tired of trying to create masterpieces while living in survival mode.
And that doesn’t mean you don’t have discipline.
It means you need a new design.
A design that honors your gift and your real life.
Because you don’t need more shame.
You need more structure.
More support.
More sustainability.
And you deserve that.
-Gold
Thanks for reading. If this resonated and you want a lil more:
→ The GVD Creative Care Package - FREE DOWNLOAD
(quick reset pdf for when you want to create but don’t feel motivated)→ Grand Vibrational Design (GVD) is a framework I’m building for creatives who want to create from alignment, not pressure.
→ The Gold Giraffe Audio Notes
(short podcasts under 10 min to get you to your next creative session)→ The Book - The 12 Laws of GVD
(the roots beneath everything you’re reading)→ The Gold Giraffe Music
(music I wrote & produced from the same inner room as these words)→ Good Vibes Dealer Incense
(the right scents for your creative space - PRESALE! NEW BATCH ON THE WAY!)